Thursday, January 3, 2008

This Jesus Christ Stuff Has Got Me Screwed

A few days ago, I was in a convenience store. I wanted to get a fountain cola. I was not paying attention, so when I put my cup under the dispenser I saw that it was unsweetened tea. I am not down with tea let alone it being unsweetened, so I poured it out to get my Pepsi. I decided to give it a taste because sometimes the drinks are about to be fizzled out or something. This one did not taste very good. I decided to go for it in the can and just get the ice. Before I could move from the drink machine the owner (I am not really sure if it was the owner. It could have been the manager) yells at me from across the store to put the cup down and get out of his store. I turned around and looked at him because I did not think he was actually yelling at me. Well, he was and he yelled at me again. I was shocked.

I think I had an outer body experience for about two seconds before I realized that the man had lost his mind. We got into a yelling match. I finally left the store calling him a rude ass man. Now, I have a potty mouth. It is something that I am working to change on a daily basis. That being said calling him an ass was the best I could do? I was ticked off about that. Maybe it was the shock of being yelled at like some street urchin but my language was extremely PG.

Anyway, when I left his store I was so angry I wanted to cry. People were asking me what was wrong and I could barely bring myself to tell the story. All I kept on thinking about was all the stuff I should have done before I left or what I could do to get revenge on him for yelling at me so rudely. No joke, revenge consumed my thoughts. Even days later, I wish I had tossed the drink on the floor so he could have something to clean up. For days, I kept on thinking of ways I could single handedly destroy his business.

Of course revenge is not right. I thought about Jesus and laughed because Lord knows I was not being Christ like. Here is the deal, I got so caught up in my anger that I did not want to see anything else. Of course forgiving the dude for yelling at me would have been the right thing to do. I could have moved on with my life without giving it a second thought.

This Jesus Walk (that's what I call trying to live like Christ) is not cool. I am going to be real about it. Even though it is for the best, I honestly believe I would have felt better if I have ruined the man’s life. Of course in the long run it would not bode well for me since all he did was yell at me and I am wishing for his livelihood to crumble. That is just evil, but it is totally what I felt and, maybe I don’t want his store to burn down in flames, but I still would have liked to tip over a display shelf or something.

I realize I need to pray about that and ask God to help me let it go. I’m just saying that this Jesus Walk is not for the weak minded or weak hearted; however, if you stay faithful and mindful the rewards are greater than anything we can dream. That is why, I know I better get these negative thoughts about that nasty old man out of my mind and worry about doing me.

Okay, check out my next post regarding Romans 12:17-21
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