Monday, January 24, 2011

A Good Start

A Good Start

He waited for her by the bench where they first met. He waited for her, not really sure she would take the same path that once led her straight to his heart so many years ago. He waited, not knowing what he would say to compel her. Somehow, “I love you,” does not seem enough, not after what they shared, what they lost.

He waited for her, thinking he should go, slink away and hide like the coward he had been. Was there anything that he could really do to make amends? He turned to leave but caught a glimpse, and that glimpse about tore him apart. She was smiling, laughing. It left him wondering how she could be so happy. For a minute he thought she was smiling because she saw him standing there, waiting for her.

No. She was smiling at the other him in her life now. He seemed to bring her a joy that could not compare to what they had once shared- what he shattered, what he was not sure he could get back. She looked so happy that he almost did not want to bother. “I love you” was not going to be enough. Part of him wanted to turn away and run; however the site of them together transfixed him.

They started his way, on the path- their path. He waited with determination rooting his shaky legs. He waited till her eyes looked up at his. He watched as they got closer to him, not really sure who he was more nervous to talk to. His tongue felt heavy as his heart raced. She stopped in front of him. She was calm, not even remotely surprised to see him.

“H hel hello,” he managed.

She smiled … maybe?

He wanted to say more but could not. He simply stared down into the stroller, into a pair of eyes that, to his surprise, stared back at him boldly, much like his own. His heart faltered. A fear unknown to him gripped him, squeezing the arrogance right out of him. He was sure that “I love you” was not going to be enough, deciding to speak the only words that could possibly matter.

“I’m so sorry.”
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